


Messages

by koob



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Texting, dumb short thing, only dave is shown pining but trust me on this one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-01
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-06-20 06:05:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15527748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koob/pseuds/koob
Summary: Basically, Dave is an emotionally stunted loser and tries to phone in a friend. It doesn't go well.





	Messages

Dave stared up at the ceiling of his bedroom, unable to sleep. He was stuck in a seemingly perpetual cycle of attempting introspection of his feelings for Hal, becoming frustrated, and then getting distracted by thinking Hal, which started the whole process all over again. 

He groaned, rolling over to pick up his phone from his nightstand. Maybe he should… talk to someone? To work out his emotions? 

He scrolled through his contacts list, before realizing there were so little people that he couldn’t even really scroll. 

There was Hal, which was a obviously a bad idea. There were his family members, which was arguably an even _worse_ idea. One of these people was dead, so that was a no go… Wait, maybe Meryl would be a safe choice. She’d probably make fun of him for struggling with simple attraction, but he could possibly avoid that by being sneaky about it. Stealthy. Subtle.

3:52 AM  
D: hey  
M: What is it

Well. That was rude.

D: well that was rude  
M: Listen man u only ever text people when u need a favor so what do u need

Distantly, he considered it odd that she was also awake at 4 AM, but for her, it was probably normal. It was Meryl, after all.

D: well no use beating around the bush about it then. youve got that whole gaydar thing right  
M: ...Oh my god

Dave felt an uneasy feeling creep down his spine.

D: how do i tell if someone is gay/into someone  
D: asking for a friend

Saying it was for a friend would deflect any embarrassment, right? That was a pretty good lie. She’d buy that.

D: if you show mei im blocking both of you  
M: This is the funniest thing I’ve ever read in my entire life hold on I’m inviting mei ling in to witness the this trashfire  
D: what.  
D: NO

Groupchat created!  
Meryl added Mei Ling to the groupchat  
ML: Hey guys! What’s up?

Dave stared at his phone in confusion. You could text multiple people at once? 

D: no  
M: Dumbshit mcgee over here stopped being a hermit for .05 seconds bc he felt a gay emotion  
ML: Oh, good for you, Dave!  
D: i hate all of you  
ML: All two of us?  
D: this is why i cut off contact with human society  
ML: Aww, Dave. You wound us.  
M: Ok ok so who’s this guy that’s getting u all woozy  
M: Got any pics  
D: hold on

He’d probably regret this, but it was a better idea than lying in bed thinking about Hal like some lovestruck loser. Well, not _like_ a lovestruck loser, because he _was_ a lovetruck loser.

Running his hand over his face, he begrudgingly pressed the “send” button for one of his few, precious pictures of Hal. It was a picture of when Hal fell asleep on him, and Hal’s face was smushed into his arm. He was also drooling a little. It was one of Dave’s most prized possessions. Hell, he’d set it as his phone background if there wasn’t the potential of Hal seeing it, and also if only he knew how. 

M: Wait. Really  
ML: Oh?  
D: what.  
ML: How do I put this… I wouldn’t really… consider him your type?  
ML: Plus, he’s got a Sword Art Online shirt on. Poor taste.  
D: please god say something that makes sense  
M: He looks like a meganerd who's sleeping for the first time in years after marathoning all anime  
D: HEY  
D: SHUT HTE FUCK UP  
M: JWKFPEJWEKJLCSLCMGJKDSFL  
D: ?  
M: That's the new hip way to express laughter. Anyways I have tears in my eyes U DID NOT FIGHT IN LIKE 16 WARS JUST TO FALL FOR THIS DOOFUS 

What?! Hal was _adorable!_ How could they not see the gravity of the situation! He gripped the phone angrily, before realizing he'd probably crack it if he got too worked up.

D: I CAME HERE FOR ADVICE I CANNTO BELIEVE YOU. ALSO PHONE KEYS ARE VEYR SMAL  
M: If u didn't tell me that that was a human being I would've been confused as to why there was a mop on ur arm  
ML: I would’ve asked why you brought a scarecrow indoors.  
M: afskljJEQPJFK  
ML: It looks like he’s never heard of a shower.  
M: Looks like the guy I pushed into a locker in 6th grade  
ML: He looks like the type of guy to have a pocket protector.  
M: And the shitty duct tape glasses  
ML: And a bowtie.  
M: And a fedora  
M: And every edition of naruto on vinyl or some shit

Mei Ling and Meryl are typing… 

Dave muted the notifications for the group chat in frustration. Well, that’s the last time he ever attempts to share his emotions. 

He opened up his previous conversation with Hal, ignoring the new texts he was getting from Meryl and Mei Ling. Traitors, the both of them.

4:01  
D: hal how do i block people

Hal responded in seconds, as expected. Working again, probably.

H: Dave, are you trying to block Meryl again? (￣ー￣；)  
D: no  
D: this time mei ling too  
H: I’ve said this before, but you have to be the one to receive all their texts, or else they start spamming other people. It’s your heroic sacrifice to the world, Dave! If not for you, everyone would be annoyed all the time! :'O  
D: can i step down from being a hero  
D: i’m no hero, never was, never will be

Dave smiled fondly at his phone, watching as Hal typed. He could even envision what he was probably doing; he could see him sitting at his laptop, back hunched, work temporarily set aside as he texted Dave in the light of his screen. He probably had on those headphones with the blue haired singing robot thing, and maybe had some instant ramen or cold pizza off to the side.

God. He was in way too deep.

**Author's Note:**

> this is kind of a dumb one shot but I still kinda like it? I really enjoy writing texting lmao  
> meryl and mei ling make fun of dave out of love


End file.
